Thursday, 21 July 2016

Search and Destroy

In the name of Allah, The Most Gracious, The Most Merciful.

Assalamu’alaikum, everybody!

Hope it’s not too late to say Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri Maaf Zahir dan Batin to all you beautiful people. At least what few that STILL read this anyway. A lot’s been happening, guys. A lot. Some of them are slightly confidential so that’s a no go on that. One thing’s for sure though: I’m SOOOOOO glad the semester’s over! I know it’s been over a month since I finished the semester but still…The relief is like holding it in for hours till you find a bathroom.

Stress nk mampos tau x?!!

Mana x stressnya? Killer subjects ada 3, all 3 subjects ada kena buat project. And there’s this one subject, they made it like a competition. Build a robot to climb a bunch of stairs. Japanese and English classes AND assignments AND projects lagi. That’s not even the best part. Almost all of the projects have to be submitted the week before our finals. Mind you, we don’t have a study week. I’ll get to that later. By the time we submitted our last assignment, I’m telling you, it was like having a boulder lifted off of our shoulders. Sort of… Exam habis baru rasa lega.

I’m currently doing my industrial training/practical. So goodbye, semester break. Which is why we didn’t have a study week. The only upside from this is that the place is really near my house.
I hope all of this is worth it. Don’t get me wrong, a good education IS important. I just think the things students do ALONG the way to get that friggin’ scroll is more often than not ridiculous. I guess it’s inevitable eh?

Already 1 days of Raya. Time goes by really quick, innit? Pejam celik, puasa. Pejam celik, raya. Makes you think though..At least it makes ME think. What plans do I have next? Kalau nak ikutkan I have my plans already. Nak execute tu je can be a real pain in the arse. I say that because we’re gonna have to sacrifice a lot of stuff. I prayed and asked for something once..And it was a long time ago…

True story…

At the time, I was in a rough place, a particularly hard time in my short almost-23-years. A position where some of them were self-inflicted but most of them were results of people inflicting them ON me. So the “true story” part is that I prayed and asked to be away from my enemies. To let my enemies steer clear away from me as far as possible. Then you know what happened?
I lost some friends. I don’t mean lost macam ada yang mati. I mean we just drifted. And some of them did things. Things that you never thought could happen to you. Things you never thought THEY would do to you.

(X sure kalau ada yang terasa sebab I doubt people read here anymore but if ada yang terasa, lantak la. I might not be talking about you pun).

And so my circle of friends turned into a semicircle. Then it morphed to a size of a slice of pie. Now it’s more like a small dot. And later it just dawned on me: Those enemies I asked to steer clear away from me earlier were my friends.

To quote Gabriel Iglesias, “I’m a decent guy. I’m not great, I’m not terrible. I’m decent”. I love meeting people. And I like listening to people’s stories. It helps me in many ways. Sometimes I’m not sure if I should be picky in the friends department. What I’m trying to say is, sometimes sacrificing certain things are unavoidable. In my case, I never thought I was gonna sacrifice ties with people. Nak buat mcm mana kan? Have to wait and find what’s in store then.
Could be something unexpected. Since the latest occurrence was MYSELF doing the unexpected – and it just blew up in my face – I’m gonna wait and just hope for the best.

I got one more year of studying. Haishhh. -____________-“

Anyway, I’m sort of halfway through my industrial training. Sikit je lagi. I’ve done half. I can do another half. Let’s do this!

See you guys on the flip side!!

P.S: There’s no reason we can’t civil

Monday, 30 May 2016

The Story So Far

In the name of Allah, The Most Gracious, The Most Merciful


I'm gonna make this post quite short and straight forward since I still got some assignments to do and I wanna take a break for a bit.

At the end of my 3rd year of getting an engineering degree now. So starting from 10th June 2016, I'll have only one year to complete my degree. That is if I don't have any subjects I have to repeat or any other complications. Minta jauh la daripada benda-benda macam tu.

I've been in UTM KL for exactly 5 years now. My 3 years diploma here was alright I guess. But I'm telling you, last week was a whirlwind. It's like all the 5 years being crammed into ONE week and then some. No BS. I had like 2 presentations, 3 tests, a few projects and some assignments. And I had to find a supervisor for my final year project (Alhamdulillah, I found a supervisor). I almost had no sleep. Literally. I went almost 24 hours without sleep.

Some of my freinds/group members saw me smiling and laughing. But they just didn't know. At least they didn't think I was being serious when I said that I feel like going insane.

It was a mentally, physically and emotionally draining week for me. I wanted to scream. I wanted to yell. I wanted to lash out. I wanted to bash someone's head into a wall. Anyone's head. That was how unstable I was.

I was on the brink of insanity. I was barely hanging on.

It was at these times that I prayed silently. HE knows.
It was at these times that I called my parents. Just hearing their voices sends a big relief to me.

Never thought that this process could be so hard. Growing up. It's like a nightmare. Although...

Growing up and growing old are 2 different things.

Last post of the semester. Probably the last one in a long time. Gonna have to start doing my work again.

See you guys on the flip side!!

P.S: In the words of Viktor Novorski from "The Terminal".


Wednesday, 6 April 2016

So Real

In the name of Allah, The Most Gracious, The Most Merciful

Asslamu'alaikum, everybody!

This song's been stuck in my head for the past couple of weeks. And a few other of his songs too. I've done a few posts about him too and mostly about him replying my tweets. Haha!

Raef is a Muslim-American artist with Awakening Records. The same record label as Maher Zain and Harris J among others. He released an album in 2014, "The Path".

This particular song is quite good. Really upbeat. Have a listen. "So Real" by Raef featuring Maher Zain.


"They say that love never lasts
That love never lives to see another day
But what I know deep down inside
It's what I feel and it's so real
I gave it up all for You
And there ain't nothing that I won't do
All I know deep down inside
It's what I feel and it's so real with You!

Allah, everyday I'll try to be as true as I can to You
'Cause loving You the best I can
Will always be my number one and only plan
Yes everyday I'll try to be as true as I can to You
'Cause loving You the best I can
Will always be my number one and only plan

They say: "You're out of your mind"
"Don't you know that love fades away?"
They say: "It only brings you pain!"
But what I feel is so real!
I gave it up and turned to You
'Cause I know what your love can do
O Allah open up our hearts
And make us feel how it's so real with You!"

See you guys on the flip side!!

P.S: The only song that COULD be better than this might be "You Are The One"

Monday, 4 April 2016

Volume of Silence

In the name of Allah, The Most Gracious, The Most Merciful

Assalamu'alaikum, y'all!

On my mid semester break right now and I'm telling you, this is probably the 1st time in 7 weeks that I'm actually resting. Things have been crazy, man. Granted, I didn't expecting my 3rd year of degree to be easy but I didn't expect it to be THIS hard either. Put it this way: Just when you finished an assignment tonight, 2 other assignments come at you tomorrow. Just when you finished writing a report, another one slumps on your desk, due the same week.

Although...I really can't say that I'm stoked on finishing college. I bet working is gonna be even more insane. At least in college, you'll get to hear "Today's class is canceled". Good luck getting that news when you start working. A lot of people know this especially those close to me but I ain't sure if I've wrote it here. The idea of doing my masters in Germany has always been appealing. That and backpacking across Europe after degree. Well, keep on dreaming, kid. That ain't gonna happen! Not yet anyway. For multiple reasons.

It just occurred to me lately that I overshare with some people. Yeah, I know it's ironic. Saying that at my own blog, where I sort of write my day-to-day things, and everybody can read it.


Sometimes you just need to vent out all these things you got bottled up inside. Even if you tell you're bestest best friend, he/she might not feel the same way and not reciprocate. In your head, that thing might be important....Sort of 'life-or-death' important. You're friend on the other hand may not share the same sentiment. So sue me if I like venting out.

I have about 14-15 months left of college. A lot of sacrifices must be made......


And quite possibly financially too.

I got 6 days left of my mid sem break. 5 full days. Gonna make the most of it by doing nothing. Haha!

See you guys on the flip side!!

P.S: Silence speaks volumes than any actions

Thursday, 3 March 2016

Do Or Do Not. There Is No Try

In the name of Allah, The Most Gracious, The Most Merciful

Asslamu'alaikum, everybody!

It's been a freaky 3 weeks into the new semester. A freaky-deaky 3 weeks. Can't say that everything's getting easier when you sorta get the hang of something. In my case, I'm doing engineering. It NEVER gets easy. Not undermining other courses but with me, a guy who loves language, music, the arts, stranded in a world full of numbers and logic, it's pretty tough. But hey, I got the idea of what I was getting myself into so I guess I can't be complaining, eh?

It's been a roller coaster ride from start to finish. IMO, I guess the decisions we make are sort of the things that change us, shape us and setup the things for us in the future. You know what I mean?

Massive congratulations to Leo Di Caprio for FINALLY getting an Oscar!

Look at it this way....

I wanted to to be a cardiologist, do medicine. I think the fact that I had a few arrhythmia attacks at 12 y/o may have been the reason. Luckily for me, someone brainwashed me to not delve into the medicine field. And tbh, one of the best piece of advice ever. Anyway, can you imagine if I DID do medicine? My college experience if I did would've been different if I decided to do it. Hence, the reason I say that the decisions we make setup the things for us in the future.

And I know that Allah S.W.T already had plans for each and everyone of us but just so you know, WE DON'T KNOW. Nobody knows. The plans we make and the choices we pick could either make or break us....

I guess what I'm trying to say is.......................................

Take the leap/plunge

It may not seem like it but I'm getting older, man. I know we're ALL getting older but certain things stick out, you know? You want proof?

Joey (Matt LeBlanc) and Chandler (Matthew Perry) from Friends more than 10 years ago

If someone asks do I feel old yet, I'd say "Hell, yeah".

I'd probably be the last person people come to for advice but here goes.....

If you always wanted to do something or get out of your chest, suck it up and do it. The outcome could be a lot of things but worry and deal with that later. First things first, do what you wanna do. Take that leap of faith and just hope for the best.

I've done it lately and let's just say I'm being optimistic. Not gonna push my luck but all I can say is....


See you guys on the flip side!!

P.S: What kind of college put their students through classes after 4 p.m??!! It's insane!!